When I was a kid - I often was teased. One of the oh so clever phrases was "You're Different [my real name]!" A boy who shall remain nameless would shout loud enough for many people to hear across the hallway in Junior High. At the time the teasing was hard to deal with, but even so my response then was always the same.... - "Umm yeah, I know!"
So snap back to yesterday, I went to a picnic for a birthday - there was lots of junk food. The crowd was mostly younger - a lot younger, so everyone brought chips and similar. The "meat" was hot dogs, and because of a mixture of hunger and willingness to be diplomatic I ate one. On the downside it was perhaps the worst tasting thing I have had in long time, On the up side I might be cured of hot dogs for life. It might of just been the way it was cooked. The awkward part was that everyone was raving about them, so I felt like I needed to keep my different opinion to myself.
The rest of the time was filled with other awkward moments. It seems I'm often great at facilitating that atmostphere. There was strawberries (so it wasn't all junk) and I said "Did you know those are filled with anti-oxidants?" A couple people looked at me strangely and no one said a word. Later on I commented on how beans are easy to make in a crockpot (slow-cooker). This was also met with a similar you are strange ness. I didn't tell anyone about my blog - so I am not sure if that would have helped or hindered me in my ability to create conversation.
I think these experiences make me realize how truly different I really am. I get deluded about this because I read about my interests frequently and always find myself talking to similar link-minded people, which is fun. It's not exactly on purpose, but I think it's just natural to want to hang out with people who are more like you. You generally have more to talk about. That being said I fancy myself someone who enjoys meeting people of all different walks of life. It's basically something I have to be good at, as I meet new students every semester. So it's odd for me when I find a big group of people that in general I don't have a connection point with.
Now I did meet some nice people, and I don't mean to offend anyone - I just think some people are different than me. And quite likely - I'm actually the different one. Luckily, no one is screaming that in my face anymore.
I actually think being different is a GOOD thing. More like a compliment, if you tell me that now. Sure, being like everyone else is bound to make a few more points connect, conversation-wise, but there's not much fun in being like everyone else. And I know that sounds a bit like preaching on it, but I mean it.
ReplyDeleteI do find myself in a similar situation as you. With my job (both of them), my interests and such, the only thing I can connect with some people is that I read books (we don't even read the same genres!) and work with a computer (not in the way they imagine it). I can go on and on about things like cooking, different foods, different jobs and different experiences, but not many people I've met are too into that.
So if you didn't meet someone you connected with, you're not missing much. Being different is a good thing, even if it is shouted across the HS halls. What you are doing in/with this blog and with what you're revealing about yourself and your life on this blog makes you a very good conversationist, and I'm sure that if you keep trying, you will attract the right crowd that is also 'different' from 'everybody else'.
Yes - I agree. Different is a good thing. I guess sometimes it just catches me off guard, and then that makes me wonder if I'm unwittingly secluding myself. So I'm okay with being different, but wonder if I'm living in dream world.
ReplyDeleteYeah- most people I meet IRL/ socially I only talk about golf or the weather with. Much like when I was taking fun dissection classes, most people don't want to know what I'm doing all day. So rather than torture them with (what I think is) a great story about how someone made brownies with avocado, I stick to "social" subjects.
ReplyDeleteIt's kinda (ok, a lot) shallow, but it keeps the society types happy, and keeps the non-society types from asking personal questions I'm not interested in answering.
Once in a while, though, a "did you know" slips out. If I'm around family it's not so bad, but with strangers? It's like I've suddenly grown an extra head, and it's trying to roast babies or something. So yeah, I get it.
Same here, I thought I actually did grown an extra head based on the looks I got at my sister's recent baby shower (I hate baby showers but love making diaper cakes... go figure) when someone said "You're next" meaning next to have a baby. While babies are great and all I replied with "Hell no!".... I'm 24
ReplyDeletehhmm..... the thought of you being different never crossed my mind! Let's meet at a doggy park soon so we can talk more and Iggy can play!
ReplyDeleteI had a similar experience when I was taking a class on food systems and we did a potluck using only foods available from the local convenience store. the stores in my neighborhood take food vouchers so they have to stock a certain amount of vegetables and meats so I made a lentil and spinach dish (in the crock pot). The rest of the students made strange concoctions of things like boxed macaroni and cheese with peas and something that had beef jerky in it. I wasn't sure whether they thought these things were genuinely healthy or they just didn't want to cook.
ReplyDeleteOh thank goodness we are different. How sad if we were all the same. Cheers to all of us!!
ReplyDeleteI've actually gotten to the point that I enjoy the "you are strange" looks that I get.
Keep it up - maybe somewhere, somewhen you will open someone else's eyes to know that there is a whole other world out there.